Have you ever found yourself wanting something so badly for your children that, in the end, your ambition only pushed them away and killed the desire they may have had for that something?
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As parents, sometimes we just get so excited when we see a spark of interest, or a hint of talent, that we tend to jump in full force to “help” and find ourselves greeted with disdain, confusion, or indifference. Although our intentions may be pure, right motive doesn’t imply right practice.
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So what can we do? Author and Unschooling Parent, Pam Laricchia speaks of providing an environment of learning that is supportive of the way each individual naturally learns, but warns against “being [unhealthfully] assertive and insistent with your support.” She goes on to explain, “[You may] find you need to use your energy to stay out of their way and watch learning blossom from a distance.”
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Wow, can that be hard! When traditional parenting and leadership tells us to take control, our intuition tells us we need to release the reins. So as we learn and grow, we are attempting to make a shift as parents. We no longer desire to be parents who “control pieces on a game board” but rather become parents who serve as “humble gardeners” propagating the ecosystem of our family.
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In the same way a gardener cannot cause vegetables to grow, we cannot coerce our kids into learning. But we can cultivate an environment conducive for them to flourish and produce fruit in due time.
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